Trying to find a sliver of humor to Martha's series unfortunate events of 2011

Without a doubt, it has been a rough year. We have not, however, lost our sense of humor about it all. Let's say it's a coping mechanism for us. After all is said and done, laughter is the best medicine.

March
Spring brought me such a NOT nice surprise. To say that I loathe bugs, insects, any creepy crawly things is an huge understatement. I kid you not when I say that one day I completely lost control and found myself yelling at the top of my lungs to some invading insects, "This.. is.. MY.. HOUSE!!!!!! This included some stomping, like a child throwing a fit. We called pest control. Problem solved.

May
I spent Mother's Day weekend in the hospital with a really bad kidney infection. I ended up with a roomie that reminded me of a Chatty Cathy doll. Really. She could not.. stop.. talking. Oh- and she kind of looked like her, too.

June
I had a really bad reaction to poison ivy, oak, and sumac. A friend said that it happened to her several times in her youth. I had just finished parking my car (from having been to the ER) and was walking home with Liam when she said that her reaction to poison ivy was so bad she looked and felt like the "swamp thing", with all the oozing and everything in the heat of summer. Despite the severe swelling and my own oozing face, I managed to laughed out loud. Some people that passed us by at the exact moment I laughed, gave me such an alarming look. There I was, no doubt looking indeed like a monster and laughing out loud, too. Yep, I must have been just as scary as the "swamp thing."

So, I was on some strong meds for the inflammation and whatnot, that made me really dizzy. Exactly a week later, I tripped over some slippers and fell flat on my coccis bone, very nearly braking it. It was quite a trip, too. I started from one end of the living room and ended up falling in the dining room. When I think about that fall now, even I laugh out loud. If it would have been caught on tape, it definitely would have made it on AFV.

August
A freak hailstorm shattered the rear window of my car. It happened only in this area. Manhattan apparently experienced bright sunny skies during our hailstorm.
Bill: "Maybe you should have ran out there and moved the car to a safer location, like the underpass of the LI expressway."
Me: "I thought about it, but considering the hail was the size of golf balls and baseballs, we would have gotten hurt. Don't you think?"
Bill: "Well, you guys could have worn the bicycle helmets."
Now picture us, with bicycle helmets running out into the hailstorm as everyone was running away from it.
Um... no.

Lastly, the hurricane called Irene that put a tree on our house. Bill and I called several tree removal companies for estimates. We had to make sure they were licensed and insured. During the selection process, he said we should forget about this one particular company because he thought they were "shady". Then, I said that I was "leaning" towards another company anyway. We both turned to look at each other and suddenly started laughing, only my laughter ended up in bawling. Two days later, one of our neighbors came over to ask us why that tree was "still sitting on our house". My immediate thought was, lady- please don't make me scream in your face. We explained that we were scheduled for the removal on that Thursday because all the tree removal companies were booked solid. I guess we needed to call a tree removal company the moment the tree fell on the house. She also told us that she thought we should all "chip" in and remove all of the trees from that abandoned property next door. Hurricane season is not over and heavens forbid another one of those trees should fall onto mine or our any of the neighbors' houses... "knock on wood".

One of my favorite websites, Scouting NY, did a post on what New Yorkers would consume as Irene passed over New York City. I seriously could not stop laughing. Apparently, New Yorkers refuse to accept the possibility of the power ever going out. Why didn't I think about taking photos of our empty supermarket shelves? It really was a comedic sight. People planned to hunker down as if a blizzard would be hitting us instead of a hurricane. We are not used to monster hurricanes up here in the northeast. Some thought of having fun with it, like Super Bowl weekend. Even I get it.

So this is the list of Martha's series unfortunate events of 2011. I seriously hope I won't have to add to it. If I do, I might have to ask the reader/s (if any) to vote at the end of the year on the one considered worst.

Hey, humor me, I have got to laugh to keep from crying. Sure, there is a subtle (or maybe not so subtle) hint of cynicism, but I have to find some humor in it all somehow.

A bad Easter and Mother's Day

Both Easter and Mother's Day were bad, really really bad. But it was all my fault.

It all started about three weeks (maybe a month) ago when I started to feel symptomatic. Uh oh. I knew immediately I would have to get myself to a doctor and start a 3 or 7-day round of antibiotics. My husband's insurance changed and now we have a $2,400 deductible. Since I knew we didn't really have the money for a doctor's visit, I did the foolish thing and tried to play homeopathic "doctor" with lots of water, cranberry juice and apple cider vinegar (yuck!). Of course it didn't work and I began having extremely high fevers on and off during the course of three weeks, which included Easter Sunday.

Tuesday afternoon I called my doc and had him phone in a prescription for an antibiotic. I took two of those on Wednesday. Since I still had a high fever and had a lot of back pain, I did the unexpected. I actually asked my husband not go to work on Thursday so he could take me to the emergency room. This tough nut felt sick enough to just go straight there. After a few tests, it was determined that I had pyelonephritis, a really bad kidney infection, and that I did the right thing in going to the hospital. I spent four days/three nights at the hospital and was released late in the afternoon on Mother's Day. Yeah, Happy Mother's Day to me. A dear friend who watched Liam for me said that it was too bad I spent four days/three nights at "the hospital and not a couples getaway." I agree. If only...

Today, Liam woke up with a fever. He has been putting up with bad seasonal allergies for two weeks now. Since he's only four, I can't give him any over-the-counter allergy medication, at least not until he's six years old. Well, it must have gotten infected now. If the fever doesn't break and he doesn't show signs of improvement, it's off to the pediatrician tomorrow..... sick as the pair of us are.

One thing is for sure. I will never take my health for granted. Never mind the house, my weight goals, the kid begging for this that and the other, and the husband. I need to take better care of myself, not skip meals, drink lots of water, take my vitamins, rest and exercise. I know better than to just let myself go. I used to be kind of cute, you know! More importantly, a precious little life depends on me. He was well taken care of, but it broke my heart to be separated for so long.

Oh, and I can't wait for that hospital bill. Hope they have a payment plan.

Here are some cell phone pics:

The hospital ward's complementary package with toiletries
(socks, toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo/body wash, lotion, comb and tissue box)

I also got a nice back massage before bedtime at 9pm.

 The view from my window. I couldn't get the pretty 3-tier, stone waterfall on the other side because of the glare.

(It was man-made by the hospital employees.)

 My boys visiting me and relaxing while watching some cable TV. (We sure miss it.)

Liam also played constantly with the hospital bed and declared that we MUST buy one for home.

 Liam holding the cookies that were brought over to me every evening before bedtime.
(I saved them for him, of course.) 

Notice his keen interest on the movie we were watching...

What movie? Wouldn't you know it... 

Star Wars Episode One
(the one with little Anakin, Liam's doppleganger)
He has only seen it fifty million times.